Well, in all honesty? Drama is a part of my life. But hey - so isn't passion! And is passion such a bad thing? Not just the passion of making love, of young love, of all those feelings that overwhelm us in a physical sense. Yes, I DO remember young, passionate love! But an overwhelming passion for life! For seeing the joy and wonder in all things - almost everything - for no matter what the state of the world is, or perhaps our lives, there is joy and wonder all around each of us, I believe. All we have to do, is look and listen. And when we have found a passion in our lives? Whatever it may be, wow! It's one of the things that makes life so wonderful.

So, as usual, I digress. lol I love words - always have - and I never really mean to give the impression I am speaking over anyone's head, gee I still have trouble spelling and pronouncing a lot of words! Thank goodness for spell check - "grins" what a handy and helpful feature, and even at that, I mess up.

Anyhow....I had to go into the hospital for lab work today. Fortunately, we don't live far from the small hospital that has been a big part of my life the last few years, but when I got up this morning, I admit it, the last thing I felt like doing was going in again. But off we went, my husband, took me in - he's such a help - and as independent as I am, and have always tried to be, I sure do depend upon him!

It's beautiful out today - sunny - the sky is that deep pure blue - there's a cool spring wind - but it smells so good -and the ride from home there, is along a two-land road (mostly all our roads here are two-lane, curvy, country roads). From the road we take, you can see the White Mountains of New Hampshire - and the snow that still covers its top. We've seen deer along the road, wild turkey - porcupines - you never know what might come out of the woods - one afternoon, coming home, a good sized buck ran out in front of me....moving so fast, he had disappeared from view into the woods in no time at all.

So, we go to the hospital - I get the lab work done - Florence - she heads up the lab, and she's the best lab tech I've ever known and a wonderful woman - we joke and kid around and despite me always having a problem with blood work because my dang veins are so small, Florence never has any problems - in and out in no time and I never feel a thing.

We take the ride back - the road sure is bumpy from frost heaves - and winter wear and Raven stops by the post office to pick up the mail. And there it is - the card - the one above....oh yeah, I did change it somewhat - but it sure is beautiful.

I had been feeling a little low yesterday - wondering would I be remembered on my birthday? Would I receive some greeting cards - I send them out all the time, you know, but sometimes, people forget. I understand that - but well, today, there is waiting for me in the post office this beautiful card. From two very beautiful friends....they are quiet and reserved and I know value their privacy, so I won't mention their names because of that, but I love them both alot - and they too, have traveled a rough road the last few years - him - battling cancer - she a devoted and loving wife - doing for him, what Raven does for me. But things are looking up for them both a little and I'm so happy for that - I can't think of any two people who deserve more in life.....than they do - and you know WHO you are...."smiles"

So, you made my day! And inside the card? There are these few words, that have touched me so much, lifted my spirits and in these few words, I guess my wondering doesn't have to be often - because I know that the card was chosen with love and care - not a quick peek at the outside and yeah it's pretty and I'll send this one......I know, because I know them well.

Inside it says, "She was the kind of woman who had never been ordinary... not even once. Happy birthday to extraordinary you."

It made me cry....but tears from the heart. It made my day. Thank you my friends.

And now I have to get ready again. The doctor's office called and they want to see me today - something about the blood work - so I called my Dad....Raven just left for work and it's a long ride in there for him - I didn't want to call him so he would have to come back so soon after leaving. These days, we all need our jobs. Especially as we get older - it gets harder to find work then, despite experience and abilities and knowledge. This society does not value its elders. But hey! That's another story! So, I better get going. I want to get this online before I leave. This card is not just a card - it's passion! The beauty of a flower, the beauty of the words and the love that sent it to me. PASSION!

April 15, 2003

Another beautiful morning! It's suppose to be warm today - may hit 70 degrees! A heat wave! lol Then we're suppose to get colder temperatures toward the weekend and maybe even snow. SNOW???? Sheesh! Well, that's New England for you. We love to complain about our weather up here - but spring is so dramatic! and especially after a long winter, like this year's has been. But it was warm yesterday too and there are definite signs of new life returning - poking its way through the leaves of fall. I love all the seasons, but spring, to me, is always like a promise.

How I remember however, the move we made to Tucson in February 1979, right after the "big" blizzard of 78 - if anyone remembers that one. We gleefully said how happy we would be to never seen snow again! But that changed - "smiles" but a different story for a another time.

I can't actually believe I am doing this online "blog" thing! lol But do you know what I think is one of the really outstanding points in this blogging? You get to stand on your own soapbox for as long as you want, and well, if no one wants to listen, all they have to do is leave the website or hit the little X at the top of the page. "grins"

My Mother was always telling my Father to get off his soapbox. lol So, I guess I inherited it. ha ha Another story - yep for another time.

Well, I went to the doctor's yesterday afternoon - had some more tests and more scheduled for next week. I'll just have to wait and see what they find out - I think I did say I was a challenge - even to doctors? lol

I've been doing alot of writing back and forth with friends and others, over the war in Iraq. It's a serious topic of discussion and we all have our viewpoints - but what I find most disturbing personally, is those who say, on one hand, this war is being fought for freedom, but on the other hand, if your opinion differs from theirs you are un-American, unpatriotic, do not support our troops and even worse still, a traitor. What about the First Amendment? Don't we all have the right to voice our opinions if that is what our country is truly all about?

I don't believe in violent protest - I didn't spit on returning servicmen from Vietnam - I would never do anything like that. I had many family members who served in Vietnam. Thankfully, they did come back home. I didn't participate in any protests back then either and I don't see myself doing it now. I was there to welcome our troops home from Desert Storm....and when the war was declared over in Vietnam, I was happy our men and women would be coming home finally. Yet, after all these years, my heart breaks over friends who suffer from cancer, PTSD and other physical ailments related to chemical exposures in Vietnam. How long did it take the government to admit to Agent Orange? What about Project SHAD?

My 82-year-old Father who is a combat vet from Pearl Harbor...I have on our website a write-up on the 60th anniversary of Pearl Harbor, which includes the personal recollections of my Father.

He, along with thousands of other vets, has to continue to battle to get the medical attention he needs and deserves and was promised. Yet, he once again going through a hassle to get in to see a doctor for an ongoing medical problem - even trying to get someone on the phone is nearly impossible. After making numerous long-distance phone calls on a pension and SS benefit he barely gets by living on, he gets one number where he's told for $1.00 he can leave a message! I'm still fuming over this one!

Then in today's edition of the New Haven Register, I read an article by Mark Zaretsky. This is what it says in part:

Vets facing health-care shortage

Mark Zaretsky, Register Staff April 15, 2003

WEST HAVEN - The nation already is challenged to provide adequate health care to millions of veterans, and must deal with the problem as it prepares to receive thousands of new vets from the war on Iraq, the national commander of the American Legion said Monday.

"We have a real crisis - a problem throughout the whole country, dealing with health care - particularly at a time when we're creating new (war) veterans," National Commander Ronald F. Conley said at a brief meeting with veterans and staff at the Veterans Affairs medical center.

Generally speaking, veterans who have served in a war seek treatment more often than those who have not.

"It's important that we as veterans" make sure political leaders "understand the need for mandatory funding for the VA," said Conley, who represents 2.8 million members of the American Legion, the nation's largest veterans' service organization.

So, in voicing my opposition to a war, and I won't go into all of that now. I've decided to step back from this war discussion, for a while, because sometimes I believe, there is more emotion talking, than thinking and remembering the past. But here's my Dad, 82-years-old, one of not many that are left alive from Pearl Harbor, who is still trying to get the medical treatment he needs as a combat vet....and while folks wave the flag and talk about our troops and the sacrifices they all make in the name of freedom, I only wish sometimes they would take the time and recall some facts - of how so many go without medical treatment or the services they were promised, for the sacrifices they did make for all of us and who and what admininstrations make the cut-backs.

My Dad said to me yesterday: "Jeanne, I think they are just waiting for all of us to die. That way they don't have to pay out anymore to anyone for anything."

Remember our veterans! How soon, and how very long, some of us wait, to remember. So for all of those emails being passed around talking about the flag and vets and who label those of us who question...please take a few minutes of that time and contact your elected officials to tell them to stop the continual state and federal cutbacks on much needed veterans services. To me, that's a lot more helpful than telling someone they are un-American, because they dare to question.

Well, my soapbox is creaking.....(and I hear my Mom's voice....."George! Get off your soapbox!") LOL